Two Hearts That Beat As One
They had this thing they would do together. I mean, rarely, but it happened. It started on the first date. There was a playing card lying face down on the street as they walked by.
“Okay, that is the Jack of hearts”
“No no, I bet that is the six of clubs”
“Okay”
“Okay”
“What if you’re right?”
“We kill ourselves”
“No, seriously?”
“If I’m right, we kill ourselves. There is no other way. To guess correctly? and not kill ourselves? come on.”
“You’re awful. If I’m right, you pay for dinner, if you’re right I pay for dinner.”
“And then we kill…?”
“No! Okay flip it over.”
“Three of hearts.”
He wasn’t religious. As he got older he did dabble in spirituality, but when things went to shit, his brain would strip itself of the calm acceptance spirituality had lent him. However, coincidence really affected him. Chance… got to him. The lack of explanation was one thing. But, it was also the lack of reaction from others. Once, when he was younger, his brother came home with the same hoodie he had purchased just the day before. He watched everyone laugh, “what a coincidence,” they said. He went upstairs and repeatedly smacked his head against the wall.
At school, the wind slammed the classroom door at the same time as a door slammed in the movie ‘Matilda’. It was the last day of primary three, so they could watch movies. His heart started racing and his nose began to bleed. He ran to the toilets. The student teacher, on her first placement, followed in terror. There he was, sitting on the bathroom floor, uncontrollably screaming. His mouth could not open without vibrating the walls with his distress. It sounded like he was being attacked, and when he returned to class with blood stains on his face and red eyes, it looked like it too.
In his twenties, he and his friends were pre-beving before a night out. The usual shite songs were on, the ones you listened to ironically…at first. Eventually, Cascada would be playing and, no one would be laughing.
“Right who’s next?”
“Roadhouse Blues by The Doors!” he said in unison with another of his friends.
Mild laughter lived and died fast.
“What the fuck?” he said.
“Whit?” laughed his friend.
“That’s fucking weird man.”
“What? We both like the doors.”
His heart started racing. Sweaty palms.
The more people laughed at minor coincidences, the more extreme his reactions would become. He felt it must have a meaning. He would start judging others for their lack of confusion and intrigue. Because they could get over it. But, he couldn’t. It meant something to him. It would drive him mental for days afterwards, but luckily these strange occurrences did not happen often.
So many answers in his life, and the world, that did not interest him. Theories on international conflict, evolution, climate change…none of it. These were unanswerable to him. He gave up his participation and he was okay with it- it aided his survival. In front of his eyes, however, coincidences recalibrated his brain. As if, all this backed up intrigue and empathy; the fervour, the indignance, came back all at once. The human instinct to fight for injustice, which was once dormant in his mind, returns only for his vague expectation that chance must have a reason and what the fuck is it.
He had been with his girlfriend for three years now. She spots a card on the floor and starts to laugh.
“Look!”
“Aw, I don’t want to guess.”
”Come on, we have to.”
“No man, come on, we are getting soaked here.”
“Seven of…No! Queen of clubs!”
“Okay”
“No, now you guess.”
“Fine. Two of hearts.”
“You buy dinner right?”
“Yes.”
“and if you’re right?”
The wind picks up and reveals the two of hearts.