Bry Brae
There was an old folk tale about a tall hill in my hometown. It was one of those concrete hills with few barriers to help you keep balance. The sorta shit that now would never be commissioned due to health and safety measures. But, back then, if you fell down a hill, you got severely injured, and the only one punished…was yourself.
I wonder what it was called before "Bry Brae". Anyway, the story goes that Bry, Brian, worked as a shipbuilder. He was an alcoholic. I nearly said awful alcoholic, but truth be told, you couldn't find a man back then who was not a functioning alcoholic. There were some suggestions he beat his wife, and despite how generally probable that was, I won't comment on it. Who knows how many times this tale has been reimagined. I've sat in pubs and heard retellings that implied Bry was a Spy, and the old man who told me this did not even address the fact that that rhymes. He was hell-bent on declaring Bry as a traitor to his country and that the way he died was too pretty. Come on, man, it rhymes; just laugh about it or something.
So one night, after his usual post-work drinking session, Bry sets off home. The hill was usually avoided by sober humans as it was legitimately a risk to try and take it on. With a wee bit of Dutch courage, Bry heads for his future namesake. He is described as podgy, with hair all over his face yet minimal on his head. Some say his trousers were halfway down as he forgot to do his belt back up after going for a piss. I like to imagine that this was deliberate on his part, that maybe Bry's accumulating freedom led to exhibitionism. Who am I to force a kink on someone's legacy? Who am I to claim Bry skanted himself? I am not that guy, and I never will be.
It was maybe raining. Probably was. Bry slowly begins the descent with a smirk on his face. His sober brain functioned just enough to let his drunk brain know how funny he was. He laughs a prolonged, "fuck sake". He was brave for choosing the path of most resistance, but he did not go about his walk with courage. Bry was barely moving. He had perfected the art of inebriation, so perhaps, he was more alert than others would be if they consumed the dangerous levels of alcohol Bry did daily. That is a sort of gift, to be fair. I mean, some people probably can drink and drive with precision.
During his journey, the story goes anyway, that Bry remembered a colleague of his had given him a pill of some sort. I'm not sure how prevalent ecstasy would have been at the time, but that is the drug that is consistently mentioned in retellings of the tale. The sight of the pill and the surprising memory of Bry led to a congratulatory gulp. The rain had stopped by this point as if by fate. The sky was blank, only influenced by Bry's breath creating their own clouds. The pill hit him instantly. His grin was indescribable. It was like….
Bry, filled with joy, attempted to set off running down the hill. Something that is indescribably unwise…like deciding to…pshhhhht. He trips on his trouser leg and tumbles down. The coroner, apparently, declared Bry died of a heart attack during the fall. Like, literally, the journey from the top to the bottom of the hill was long enough that he managed to not only have a heart attack but complete it before he reached the bottom. It's nice to say someone completed a heart attack instead of dying.
So that's why we call it Bry Brae.
Although, that doesn't really answer the question. Why do we call it Bry Brae? Because some random alcoholic, wife-beating, exhibitionist spy died there? In modern times, the tale has been moulded by the druggies. You'd see it at school; the kids that bumped off would be up at Bry Brae. They would charge down the hill, trying to get "high". Bry Brae had become a drug to children who hadn't experienced drugs before. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I reckon those children did end up getting into drugs and, on reflection, laugh at themselves for thinking a concrete hill will get them fleein.
I wonder what Bry would think about this. Imagine having an accidental legacy that you never got to see? Anyway, as usual,
Cheers